Friday, July 27, 2012

Magic Mike

A few of the bookclub ladies and I got together last night to see the critically acclaimed, sure-to-be-a-classic movie, Magic Mike.  


Not to sound like a snob, but the movie wasn't very good.  Surprised?  I was too because although I was expecting a plotless excuse to show a male review nationwide on the big screen, it was worse than I thought.  The movie attempted a plot which was so bad it made me wish it was only a male review show.

Mike (the guy in the center) is a gifted stripper with big dreams of making crappy furniture out of garbage he finds on the beach.  He works odd jobs during the day, one of which is as a roofer where he meets "The Kid," a nineteen year old hunky loser who lives with his sister.  I know he lives with his sister because he tells Mike he is living with his sister and also because all the dialogue throughout the entire movie between "The Kid" and the sister goes like this:

The Kid: Hey Sis, thanks for letting me bunk on your couch.
Sister: No problem, Brother, that's what sisters are for.
The Kid: Remember when we were kids and had the same parents?
Sister: Yeah, the same mom and the same dad... good times.
The Kid:  Sis, can you spot me 20 bucks?  I got fired from my job for stealing a pop.
Sister: Oh, baby brother, what am I going to do with you?
The Kid: Well, whatever you do, don't forget I'm your brother! Ok, Sis?

Get it?  They are brother and sister, dummy.  Mike gets The Kid into the lucrative business of male stripping which The Kid LOVES.  I mean, who wouldn't?  You know who doesn't?  Mike.  He's been doing it for six years and he's sick of it.  When is he going to admit that his life is going nowhere, and he's NOT the crappy furniture maker he wants to be, and he is just an aging (and gifted) male stripper, shaking it for ones every night of the week?

The Kid gets into drugs and his sister gets mad at Mike about it because Mike said he was going to take The Kid under his stripper wing and take care of him but he didn't. (shocker)  The big dramatic moment of the movie is when the sister goes to Mike's house looking for her brother who didn't come home.  Mike says he is upstairs with a girl and the sister goes up and finds her brother passed out on the floor and there is a pot-bellied pig eating his puke.  Gross!  She rails against Mike for not keeping his promise and calls him a loser which really hits Mike right in his heart (of gold) and makes him come to terms with the path his life is on.  I'm not going to tell you the rest of the plot in case you haven't seen it and want to see it (don't bother), but I'm sure you can guess what happens.

Matthew McConaughey is in the movie.  He is the owner of the male dance club.  He does an outstanding impression of Matthew McConaughey throughout the whole movie (he says, "Alright, alright, alright!" about 50 times), and he does not wear a shirt in even one scene.  I don't think he ever wears a shirt in real life either.

Matthew McConaughey as Uncle Sam.
Remember when he was in Amistad?
I saw my Mother-In-Law yesterday and told her I was going out with my ladies to the movies.  She asked what movie and I told her and she said, ".....Oh..... Well.... Matthew McConaughey is in that.  He's a good family man."  I said, "Yeah, that's why we're going."

My favorite line from the movie is where Mike and The Kid are sitting on the beach talking about the stripper life and how much they have to look forward to and The Kid says, "I'm having a ball...  I'm having. A fucking. Ball."

7 comments:

  1. The movie was stupid. The music was great! Still singing..."They call me Dr. Love..."
    Loved the company :)

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  2. I was disappointed when I saw it, too.

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  3. I LL'd out LL at this, especially "He does an outstanding impression of Matthew McConaughey throughout the whole movie..."

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  4. I hadn't planned on going to this movie, and now I don't have to thanks to your post! I know exactly what happens! Yay! Also, I think Channing Tatum's looks are over rated. I'm more of a Jake Gyllenhaul kind of lady. Also, I tagged you in my latest blog post. Enjoy filling out the fluff!

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  5. Gonna skip this one, but your post about it is awesome.

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  6. Dana McKibbage WaldbilligJuly 30, 2012 at 12:29 PM

    Spot on, Sarah. I've been looking forward to reading your review since last Thursday. My favorite moment was when a nearly-naked Matthew McConaughey came out on the stage beating a bongo. Too funny. Remember he had the cops called on him by an annoyed neighbor for playing the bongos naked in his own living room?! LOL
    Can I just say, I could look at Joe Manganiello ALL DAY. He can't dance worth a shit, but holy hell. He could just stand there and do nothing and I'm still gonna stuff bills in his G-string.

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  7. i loved that stupid movie. matthew cracked me up the entire time.

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